We went on holiday with our neighbours and swapped families - it tore us apart

ByEmily Doughty

Rachel Stone was five and her brother Ian was 10 when their mum and dad took them on a caravan holiday to Wales with the family next door.

Rachel and her mother Kay moved in with the neighbour Eddie and his daughter Alison. Eddie's wife Irene and their daughter Dawn moved in with Rachel's dad Rex and her brother Ian.

Rachel tells Dr Sian Williams, host of Radio 4's Life Changing podcast, of the trauma of her family being torn apart, the chaos that unfolded and how she has come to forgive her parents.

Rachel and Ian had initially been delighted when a new family moved in next door. "We instantly hit it off, all four of us." They were thrilled to be going on holiday together.

But when it was time to go home, everything was mixed up - people were getting in the wrong cars.

Rachel remembers her mum leaning back from the passenger seat, saying: "'We're going to have a new family. We're going to be living in number eight with Eddie and Alison. Alison's going to be your new sister.

"And your dad and brother are still going to live in number 10. And Auntie Irene and Dawn are going to live there. And Dawn's going to be your brother's new sister."

As the car rumbled along, she felt "bewildered, but also a little bit excited". She liked Alison and had always wanted a sister.

That night, Alison let her sleep on her top bunk and the next morning the adults switched belongings between the houses in the Isle of Sheppey where they lived.

My family was 'jumbled up'

Life at number 8, where Rachel now lived, was very different to number 10. Her old house had been clean, whereas this house had "dog hair, greasy things, car things".

Her stepdad Eddie "was never horrible to me, but I never called him dad. I wasn't his girl."

"I used to wait in the front garden for him to come home from school when I was a toddler."

Rachel, pictured here at nine years old, says life with her new family at number 8 was very different to her old life

Rachel was seven when the two couples went to court together and got divorced. They later married their new partners in separate low-key registry office ceremonies.

Rachel did not even know her dad had married Irene until she saw the wedding photo. Her visits to her old home tailed off when she was about 11 or 12. She says she found it difficult to go and visit her dad and did not get along with Irene.

"[He] was quite possessive and controlling. By the time we got to 13, she [Mum] said, 'it's not sustainable, [we] can't live like this".

Rachel said school was her "escape". She got good grades and became a teacher. She got married and had two sons but is now separated and works as a business coach.

Decades later, on a family holiday with her own sons, Rachel asked again.

She says her mum was "beside herself with guilt and the shame... for her selfish decisions"

"Years later she actually said to me - the words I almost wanted to hear all my life - 'I'm so sorry I let you down and I want to try and make it up to you.'"

Despite being separated as children, siblings Rachel and Ian remain close

Rachel never had a close relationship with her dad. "He told me he had a choice between his wife and his children. Unfortunately for me, he chose his wife."

But when she spoke at her dad's funeral, Rachel said she felt she owed him an apology.

"And I wanted him to be like that. But I also think you have to accept people for who they are.

Get our flagship newsletter with all the headlines you need to start the day. Sign up here.